15 hours in-between: mingyu character analysis

[amismatch]

 This is a response I've given to a comment under my jigyu (mingyu/jihoon) fic, 15 hours in-between. There was a bit of constructive criticism given to me concerning Mingyu and his character, and my answer ended up becoming a long analysis of the nature of Mingyu's "implied personality disorder," his relationship with his mother, and his place in the fashion industry. I've added specific trigger warnings in my response as needed. 

Please understand that I lean on generalizations when referencing the modeling/fashion world that not every model experiences, so please do not think that this is something that occurs to everyone in the industry or that I believe as such. This is centered around Mingyu's character growth in terms of 15 hours in-between. 

There are spoilers if you haven't read it; be warned! 


The comment was as such: 

I read a lot of your work but feel like this work deserves so many kudos. The way you spun the stories in cycles was phenomenal -- revelation here, background there -- and the work passed by before you knew it. It's insane that there was no tension between the narratives of Mingyu and Jihoon and the Costa Rica trip. My sole nitpick, if I had to have one, was that Mingyu's situation with the Esteem photographer made his psychology came off a little flat. It felt like the situation enforced his status as a domesticated dog, rather than that being his personality all along. Then again... Maybe that's a point you were making. This Mingyu is a slave to his situation.

Love the way you set the scene through seemingly small snippets scattered throughout surrounding sentences. Appreciate the story ending on an unconventional note. Thankful as always that you choose to publish your writing.

Here is the response I made. The only edit I made were additions to the trigger warnings. I will continue to discuss my response after this:  

forewarning that this is going to be long lol.

Hi, thank you! I always appreciate your words/seeing your comments. i’m glad you felt like them being set in CR didn’t feel disjointed or misplaced in terms of their own development and interactions with one another; i had the idea to have them take a “vacation” during the creation of the fic/plot, but i didn’t decide exactly where until i had the plot/dynamics cleared away. Just knew I wanted it to be tropical—and since I’m already familiar with CR and knew places I could set them in within the country, I decided on that.

My sole nitpick, if I had to have one . . . It felt like the situation enforced his status as a domesticated dog, rather than that being his personality all along. This is actually an interesting constructive criticism that I wanted to try to address. So, the entire catalyst/reason for mingyu having his contract on the line/being blacklisted was because of the interaction with the photographer.

there were several things i was trying to accomplish with mingyu’s background and personality disorder (which, i put ‘implied personality disorder’ in the tags, but to be more specific it was histronic personality disorder. I didn’t specifically put the disorder in the tags, because I felt like it kinda sullies it if the reader googles the disorder and reads point by point what it is before reading; so that kinda took that away for you to figure out what is and is not a symptom of his disorder. you become the sort of detective, sorting him out, if that makes sense.) 

with the moments of exposition/introspection, i was also trying to establish that his mother has the same personality disorder. it is a disorder that is both a mixture of genetics and environment, so both factors heavily influence mingyu (his mother being that environmental /and/ genetic factor for him growing up). Then, I tried to follow this thought process: his mother’s a supermodel and gave birth to an equally-gorgeous child. she raised him to become a model. the combination of her pressure on him to follow in her footsteps and the fact that she has instilled in him the symptoms of her own personality disorder (“There’s nothing wrong with wanting the entire world to fall in love with you . . . to love and be loved.”), this has shaped mingyu to be who he is.

And his appearance and place in the industry doesn’t help that, does it? Being attention-seeking and performative may not help for a job like… accounting, but it DOES help /a lot/ when you’re in the modeling industry. you have to put yourself out there. you have to be bold and brave and want people to love or like you. it is an intimate job that is more difficult for those that may be more introverted or not confident. it’s a vicious cycle that feeds mingyu’s disorder. for example:

He seeks attention and performs attention-seeking behaviors because of his disorder —> this helps him in his workplace, because it gives him more limelight to be seen by bookers and fashion designers —> it causes a positive feedback cycle where the more he succumbs to the symptoms of his disorder, the more work he books, the more campaigns he goes on, the more fashion shows he walks for, etc. etc.

tw // sexual assault , sexual harassment, abuse, diet mention, weight mention 

this… part of my response is going to sound grim and paint the industry in a bleak light—but the honest truth is that the modeling industry is and can be very exploitative. really, it’s an unfortunate consequence of powerful people that have nothing to lose (and are /protected/ by the industry) and are in control of the livelihood of people with everything to lose and no union to protect them. it’s more than common; it’s sometimes told to you that this is something you’re going to have to grapple with. and that is sexual assault/harassment by those that book you/shoot you for campaigns/get you into shows.

what i mean by this is that there are hundreds and hundreds of stories by models that are sexually propositioned in order to book work that either accept it and therefore get ahead, or refuse it and become blacklisted. i’ve had some exposure to the fashion industry and i have peers that i’ve talked to about their experiences as well. am i saying it happens to EVERY model? of course not. but it is scarily common, too. many are terrified to talk about it because that gets them blacklisted, too.

that brings me back to having that be mingyu’s catalyst to being blacklisted. if it feels like i played into the domesticated dog thing it’s also because you are a metaphorical dog as a model, too. youre the coat hanger. you jump when youre told to jump; youre flying to 4 separate countries within days to walk for shows and living in 10+ people model apartments and being told how much to eat, how much to exercise, what’s wrong with you, so on and so forth. so mingyu is very much forced into being that domesticated dog for the sake of his career—and that presents itself in his demeanor and thought process(es), AND only reinforces the symptoms of his personality disorder.

the only person he’s had that tries to fight for his autonomy is seungkwan. and even seungkwan is a cog in the system, his hands basically tied. him flying Mingyu out without telling his mother was that /tiny/ sliver of control he tried to give mingyu back, and i tried my best to reference and imply this in their conversations + mingyu’s moments of introspection.

of course, how well i’ve done to accomplish that falls in those that read it with zero context from me. SO i can 100% accept that i could’ve done a poor job in expressing this. i /try/ to teeter along a balance of showing vs. telling vs. letting the reader fill in their gaps to reach a conclusion. i respect your POV.

so /is/ the domesticated dog metaphor his personality all along? perhaps. it’s also heavily influenced by the nature of his job (forced docility to book work and prevent being blacklisted), the hold his mother has on him (as shown by him having to put her on silent, her calling the agency in a rage, his brief mentions of his mother criticizing him), *and* his personality disorder. where is the Kim Mingyu within all of that? who knows. maybe it all has become him. there’s no way to discern anymore.

this sounds like im trying to convince you to change your opinion re: your constructive criticism. im not exactly trying to do that, promise lol. i just want you to know where my thought process went with this detail. im pleased/surprised to see concrit on my fic(s) and i know that means that you cared enough to give it. so, thank you! i hope i made sense here.

edit: Then again... Maybe that's a point you were making. This Mingyu is a slave to his situation. this was a very long response to say that, yes, it was part of the point i was making shdfhjds

edit edit: Thankful as always that you choose to publish your writing. this is so nice of you to say, and i appreciate it. it is validating.

Giving constructive criticism is a delicate balance. I personally believe the person that had given this to me did so well, in a way that shows that they'd provided it because they care and enjoyed the fic, not because they didn't. I'd contemplated writing an analysis on 15 hours in-between for a while, so this was as good an excuse as any. 

If you have any questions or concerns about my response or anything concerning the fic, you can do so anonymously by clicking here. Otherwise, you can reply to this journal post below.